Life in my 40s in Minnesota is not as expected. Big surprise. Are any of us doing what we envisioned in our youth for our grown-up selves?
I face strange choices about family vs. work vs. pursuing my true talents. I have the luxury of complaining about first-world problems and not whether the water is drinkable or whether my children will starve. The death of a good friend's 11-year-old son has knocked some sense into me about the real problems I don't have.
Does this mean I've found contentment? Not exactly.
I had a hard time mourning and grieving after Special K died in May. I was not near those in Michigan who could reel from this loss with me. So I picked up The Last Lecture to allow some of my emotions to come up to the surface. And in it, I did find comfort and release.
I also found inspiration.
Since moving to MN, I have complained about not finding my way into the yoga community here. I have sent emails and resumes. I have knocked on studio doors. I have been met with silence at best; offers to take that studio's teacher training program at worst. I have come up with reasons why there might be resistance to a teacher of my experience. I have shelved my enthusiasm for introducing Eischens Yoga to a new community. And Randy Pausch's Last Lecture kicked me in the butt and reminded me that the brick walls you encounter are there to help you discover how much you really want to do something. How hard you'll try to scale, dig under, or break through that wall.
Eischens Yoga is going to make inroads into the Twin Cities.
Look out, brick wall.